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Recent Movie Reviews

Short: Old Lady Short: Old Lady

Rated 4 / 5 stars

Very funny

I don't quite know why, but this made me laugh so much I had to watch it over and over about 10 times.

Your New York accent is perfect for a granny mugging giant sandwich who doesn't care about the orphans.

Wolfenheim responds:

i didnt know i had an accent.

laSALSA: Verde laSALSA: Verde

Rated 2 / 5 stars


Well the nutcracker music variation was quite good, if indeed that was you who put that together that was fitting. The animation was in time with it...almost.

Using technology to create an animation about how bad technology is is pretty shit. Frankly, I'm glad that stupid hippy died. We don't need any more nieve bints who don't know how the real world works wasting space.

Don't worry, this review will get deleted soon as people aren't allowed to have negative opinions anymore on Newgrounds.

[ClockDay09] Running NG [ClockDay09] Running NG

Rated 1.5 / 5 stars


Look at all these suck ups voting 10. This is not a 10/10 piece of work. The drawings were good, the jokes were not. Anything that relates to Newgrounds itself gets 10s without question, this is no exception.

To be banned.

Recent Game Reviews

Enigmata: Genu's Revenge Enigmata: Genu's Revenge

Rated 4 / 5 stars

Pretty Good

This is a very enjoyable game and I found myself playing it for a number of hours now. The upgrade system is well thought out with a very nice reward system. The music is fitting, the graphics are nice for the most part (the ships themselves could have been drawn a bit better I'm sure) and good controls. The presence of a story, although a rather vague one, is a nice touch too.

Although the game is great, there are a few things that irritated me:
- The ships on screen are so big! It's very difficult to manoeuvre around to avoid the hundreds of lasers all over the screen.
- I can't quite understand why there are negative bonuses, it seemed to me neither fun nor a good hindering process for avoiding an obstacle - only an annoyance.
- Those Nekon Attack missions just seemed like a waste because the rewards are so small. I found myself not even bothering to attempt the gold and platinum ones.
- Since the basic gun for your ship is fairly poor, you pretty much have to rely only on bonus weapons to get any damage done. For about 70-80% of the game time, a weapon bonus is active. They're more like standard essentials than bonuses.
- The bosses on occasion fly down too low and since they're already taking up half the screen, this makes it impossible to avoid any projectiles. This is particularly the case with the boss on level 17 (where I'm stuck).

All in all though, this is pretty good.

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Legend Of Zelda Chess Legend Of Zelda Chess

Rated 4.5 / 5 stars


It's wonderful to see something like this appearing in the portal.

From what I saw, the AI was very good. On hard mode it beat me and I always thought I was pretty good! Chess AI is one of the most difficult things to program around. A nice touch with the Zelda theme too. I do hope that this is recognised for it's great effort. This is an admirable entry and I really hope you do well in your future submissions.

Karoshi:Suicide Salaryman Karoshi:Suicide Salaryman

Rated 4 / 5 stars

Very good

I very rarely complete a game with my little patience, but this one I managed to get right the way through! On each level I couldn't wait to see what amusing things were coming up next. This was so much fun, the graphics and music kind of reminded me of the good old early days of Newgrounds. Just one question though, why shoot safes and reflecting walls when he can just shoot himself in the head?

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Recent Audio Reviews

The Slug Wringer The Slug Wringer

Rated 2.5 / 5 stars


Well, my first thought upon listening to this was "What the fuck is this dog shit?" I then looked at your comments about 'getting it'. I guess I must be "thick", because given your second account, I certainly don't see any of your modest "artistic greatness" from this piece.

Still, it did make me laugh so I've give you a nice juicy 5/10

Torm responds:

Maybe I shouldn't have put the comment down because nobody seems to understand sarcasm on the internet. This is the most beautiful dog turd in the world, it's all covered in glitter and that.