Roast's movie Reviews on Newgrounds

[My US of Whateva!]

Oh god

Graphics were good, which is usually all that's needed on Newgrounds because the majority of the viewers are dipshits. I think we've seen enough music videos, especially when based on really crap old songs like this. We've also seen enough animations with George Bush in them too. So no originality there. He seems to change his voice from impression to singer throughout this thing which is pretty crap.
1/10.

[Miss Dynamite XIX]

One suspect is Asian

One suspect is Asian...so what, is she from India? Or Japan? Pakistan? There's what, about 25 countries in Asia? I wish people wouldn't say 'She's Asian,' that doesn't mean shit.

Anyway, this flash was reasonably good. Bit short though.

Sirkowski responds:

What, you expect the police is gonna ask a fleeing suspect what country she's from??? Think damnit! X-D

[Star Warz - thingie.]

Not good

Slow and unfunny. Exactly what I predicted.

ZekeySpaceyLizard responds:

You predicted it would be bad, watched it ANYWAY, and are now complaining?

Damn.

Not only did you set off the Tardometer, you broke it.

Idiot.

[Kingdumb hearts]

Funny

Yep, definately the WORST impression of Donald Duck EVER! That made me laugh though. This was erm...interesting. I'm not sure why loads of Disney characters are in it. That song at the end was crap. This must have taken a while to make, so I hope it survives.

RogerregoRRoger responds:

Well, looking at what horrible movies of mine survived newgrounds, I'm sure this will too..
Most people like the song, to bad you didn't.
The disney characters are for nostaliga, and for people to be less dissapointed their favorite disney character wasn't in the movie

[Non-Canonical Joke Minute]

Hmm

Yeah, that 'your round' joke is a really old Tommy Cooper joke. And I couldn't understand what the hell the others were saying.

[Triassic Park part 1]

Funny

I didn't think that bit was boring in the film, anyway it was still funny to see this. That bloke at the beginning was much fatter than that in the film! Hahaha!

I want to watch Jurassic Park now.

[Gory Mayhem]

5/10

Same old shit

[Come Get Some (2004)]

OK then

I didn't understand what the FUCK was going on. But it was so stupid, it made me laugh anyway.

[Plastic Hammer 4 - Melee]

Well it's not TOO bad I suppose.

The only funny bit was the 'artist' saying that there needed to be more drama. Ok why did the yank national album start playing during his speech? You copied Faulty Towers on the 'this smack on head' thing. And you copied Red Dwarf on the 'butter' thing. Why did you keep saying 'anywayS' when you're not a yank? No 'S' is needed. Why did you call it a 'movie' when you're not a yank? Why did you call it a 'cookie' when you're not a yank? Why did he call him a 'semi painted wanker' when he wasn't actually painted at all? Since you've drawned the animator i.e. YOU, are you saying that you have pink hair? Shouldn't he have said 'Make sure the MAN'S green before crossing the road'? As apposed to 'the light' since 'the light' should be red. At least you spelled 'armour' the correct way.

It was too slow and each joke was extended far too much. The voice acting was not in the least bit enthusastic which made it even more dull. There were too many silent moments after each time someone said anything. Oh, and the music during the credits was crap. By the way it's spelled 'a lot,' not 'alot.' It's two words.

A17roolz responds:

Fawlty towers was a joke I used, the butter thing I didn't even think about. I thought I'd adapt the language so yanks will get it better as 90% of NG are American, Orlando IS semi-painted (go watch episode 3, fool). Other things are minor, who cares? No-one. Stop being a good critic and without first knowing what the fuck you're on about.

dipshit.

[D-Day WW2]

Pretty boring

Not once did you say where you stole this music from, 'Battlefield 1942.'

Overall this was really quite slow and boring. There wasn't really much horrific atmosphere, just a couple of 'bangs' and 'zips' in the background.

Dull

KillMoochie responds:

i was going to put in more explosions and death and blood but I had to take a lot out because of the size and the slow speed of my flash